Those were my emotional responses to the new story on Friday that a gunman had killed 26 people at an Elementary School in rural Connecticut.
As a father of three school aged kids, I cannot begin to imagine the unfathomable desperate horror experienced by parents who lined-up to learn the fate of their precious children. 20 parents lost the devils lottery; their children were senselessly massacred in their classroom.
Getting the boys up, fed and out the door is a daily ritual. Dressing, eating breakfast, double-checking their knapsacks to ensure luncheons, homework, books and permission slips are signed.
I just cannot erase the thought of dropping my boys off at school. A short hug before they pop out, the rushed quiet “I love you dad” and the subtle wave good-bye. I just cannot erase the though of that final wave. The end – a final, unprepared, eternal good-bye - looping through your mind forever.
How do you protect anyone from madmen intent on causing destruction? There is no rhyme or reason, just callous, calculated evil.
Like other senseless shooting sprees, this will reignited a debate over gun control in the United States of America.
The big question: Will this massacre of the innocents lead to change?