Thursday, February 16, 2012

PASSING GAS IS NO JOKING MATTER

The word "fart" is generally considered unsuitable in a formal environment by modern English speakers. As a father of three boys,  farts are the genesis of many giggles and event contests. Kids are fascinated with farts. They think farting is absolutely hilarious, We have tried, fruitlessly, to introduce the word fluff for flatulence. Boobs, farts and pooh - they all  can be...well, quite funny.

 Farting can be funny. Who am I kidding, it's almost always funny. Men take pride in their ability to fart. It's as though they each have an internal desire to take ownership of their farts. Like, fart fart I am king hear me fart!

So thought  a 19 year old college student from Mississippi who has learned that calling his farts "bombs"  can have lead to some serious problems. Harold Wayne Hadley  calls passing gas, bombs. While in the restroom he doodled about the joy of flatulating in the library on some toilet paper. The note stated that he passed a bomb in the library.

Another student found the note on the toilet paper roll and passed it to a teacher, who recognized Haldley's stinky handwriting . That is when the proverbial shit it the fan! The teacher called the authorities.

The school library was evacuated. The A student  was arrested and held on $20,000 bail. If convicted of threatening to blow up the school, he faces 10 years in prison and a $10,000 fine!

No doubt the teacher blew the situation out of proportion.

Nothing clears a room like a fart -- except, perhaps, a bomb scare.

It all reminds me of a little rhyme from my youth, going back to the days when you needed to pay to use the stalls in the men's washroom at the Avalon Mall:

 Here I sit, 
broken hearted,
 paid a quarter 
and only farted

1 comment:

Jay L said...

You could always jimmy the lock with a bank card or similar. :)